kuro kuro ng isang binibini

Can somebody please help me?! -- i don't remember where i read this from: "Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, valuable, but small. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So goodnight, dear void."

a friend of my uncle visited the house (in laoag) recently and he relayed that he saw my grandmother by the altar, my grandfather was seated by the piano and my aunt was by the stereo. at first i was comforted with the thought that they were with us but then i wondered. i was told once that a soul has 2 chances to "go towards the light" so to speak, on the 9th day and then on the 40th day after their death . what did my uncle's friend see -- their spirits or just a remnant of their old selves -- a memory perhaps? were they not able to crossover? i asked my sister the same question and she said maybe they just miss us. it made me cry of course. i recently saw an oprah episode where the guest was sharon stone. they briefly discussed her near death experience and she described death as something so near -- just there. she said that she felt her soul leave her body and then she felt a deep sense of well-being and calm that she was comforted. maybe it was her anuerysm talking ...

this is a quote from the Chronicles of Narnia written by C.S. Lewis which for me captures the true essence of eternity: "For us this is the end of all stories...But for them it was only the beginning of the real story. All their life in this world...had only been the cover and the title page: now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story, which no one on earth has read, which goes on forever and in which every chapter is better than before." how great for my lola at last her story can begin...

This is my response to a necrological service for my grandmother who passed away just last month. Good evening! The family thanks you for sharing the beautiful service with us. And we thank you for your presence here tonight in -- I don't want to say "in our time of grief" because although I am saddened with lola's passing -- I feel that it's a time for us to celebrate her life because she lived the fullest of lives. To start with she married a very handsome and dashing man in my lolo. She gave birth to 7 remarkable individuals, who in one way or another have enriched my life and the lives of others. She saw 16 grandchildren grow up to be somewhat "responsible adults" -- we try our best. And she was around to see 18 great grandchildren who gave her cause to smile, to laugh and to sing. I have a treasure throve of memories of my lola all of which I will always cherish (for the rest of my life). There's one that I'd like to share with all of you to...

i wrote this a few years back. a friend of mine reminded me of the article because he was waiting for his guy who was running late. i have since added a few from the list below but i've yet to meet my prince. i do hope he's still out there! ;D Dear Prince Charming, Here's the deal. I'm single, gainfully employed, not entirely unattractive, smart, likeable, and last but not the least charming. So what's the problem you say? See the problem here is -- no one's biting. I've been on this good earth all of 27 years and I have yet to meet the ONE for me. I'm beginning to think that finding Prince Charming is Mission: Impossible! So I'm going to make this easy for everyone concerned. I've listed down (not necessarily in order of importance) the qualities I'm looking for in a man. And they are as follows: 1. Dependable a.k.a. responsible a.k.a. employed. A dependable man for me is someone who is motivated and driven to succeed in all endeavors be it...

i wrote this down in 2000 -- i don't remember now where i got it from exactly. very good points to live by... 1 - Don't undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different, each of us is special. 2 - Don't see your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you. 3 - Don't take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would your life, for without them, life is meaningless. 4 - Don't let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live all the days of your life. 5 - Don't give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying. 6 - Don't be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave. 7 - Don't shut love out of your life by saying it's impossible to find. The quickest way to receive ...

i found this in my outbox -- waiting to be sent out to friends in the year 2000 -- thought i'd just post it instead, albeit 4 years late. Chat Abbreviations Through the technology of Instant Messaging, people have coined a handful of online computer acronyms that are used to abbreviate common phrases or actions. If a jumble of capitol letters has ever confused you, then you are in the right place. Because we know that not everyone is yet familiar with these terms, we have created an online AIM Acronym Dictionary you can use for reference. Below is an alphabetical listing of online acronyms and the corresponding definition. Feel free to send this link to anyone you know that is new to online chatting so they aren’t confused when someone says "I GG, TTYL." AFK - Away From Keyboard BBL - Be Back Later BF - Boyfriend BRB - Be Right Back BTW - By The Way CYA - See You Later FYI - For Your Information G2G - Got To Go GF - Girlfriend GG - Gotta Go IC - I See ILU - I Love You IMO...

with everything that's going on in the world i take comfort in these words: nothing is higher than these mysteries. they have sweetened our characters and softened our customs; they have made us pass from the condition of savages to true humanity. they have taught us how to die with a better hope. -- cicero

that would explain it really. Scorpio Your sign is that of intense Scorpio, the eighth sign of the zodiac, best characterized by passion, intensity, and emotionality. You are considered to be the most powerful and extreme sign of the zodiac, because you deal with the process of fundamental transformation on all levels. Pluto is your ruler, Scorpio, and is known as the planet of permanent change and transformation. It is also associated with sex, the life cycle of birth and death, and regeneration. You are the second of the three water signs. Pluto's influence makes you a charismatic, yet enigmatic person. While you may appear serene on the surface, you contain a magnetic intensity and powerfully hypnotic personality, belied only by a penetrating stare of deep intelligence. Scorpio, you rule the eighth house of the chart, which is associated with other people's money, possessions, and values, as well as wealth received through inheritance; it also describes how and to what exten...

THINGS YOU WOULD LOVE TO BE ABLE TO SAY AT WORK: 1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit. 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for you? 4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. 5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way. 6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter. 7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message. 8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant. 9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying. 10. Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again... 11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid. 12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers. 13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn. 14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth. 15. I will always cherish th...

hey he was the first american president i met -- well not met as in person but known to me. i am a little bit sad to learn of his passing -- after all we all have fathers don't we? i hope i will be as eloquent as patti in my remembrance of my own dad. A Daughter's Remembrance: The Gemstones of Our Years Time taught me to appreciate a distant father—and cherish glimpses of an elusive soul By Patti Davis Newsweek June 14 issue - The house I grew up in had large plate-glass windows, which birds frequently crashed into headfirst. My father helped me assemble a bird hospital, consisting of a few shoe boxes, some old rags and tiny dishes for water and food. When I lost my first patient, when the tiny gray creature died in my hands without ever eating any of the Cheerios I'd provided for it, my father patiently explained to me that the bird was free now, flying happily through the blue breezes of heaven, where there are no hazards such as windows. I was locked into his eyes, locke...

i don't know who wrote these poems but a friend of the family shared them to us when my aunt passed away last month. i hope it offers comfort to those who are still grieving for the loss of a loved one. DON'T GRIEVE FOR ME Don't grieve for me, for now I'm free I'm following the path God laid for me. I took His hand when I heard Him call, I turned my back and left it all. I could not stay another day, To laugh, to love, to work or play. Tasks left undone must stay that way, I found that place at the close of the day. If my parting has left a void, Then fill it with remembered joy. A friendship shared, a laugh a kiss, Ah yes, these things, I too, will miss. Be not burdened with time of sorrow. I wish you the sunshine of tomorrow. My life's been full, I savored much, Good friends, good times, a loved one's touch. Perhaps my time seemed all too brief, Don't lengthen it now with undue grief. Lift up your heart and share with me, God wanted me now, He set me f...

an excerpt from Newsweek re: Ronald Reagan: American Dreamer All his life he was a dreamer, and his imagination had sustained him through the decades in ways big and small. In a remarkable letter written from the Sherry-Netherland Hotel at the corner of 59th Street and Fifth Avenue in Manhattan on a July day in the 1950s, Reagan displayed his gift for softening the rough edges of life with visions of better things. He was lonely, in the city for an acting job, and had to eat alone. Afterward, back at the hotel, he wrote Nancy about the evening he wished he'd had—with her. "Eight million people in this pigeon crap encrusted metropolis and suddenly I realized I was alone with my thoughts and they smelled sulphurous," he wrote her. "Time was not a healer. When dinner time finally arrived I walked down to '21' where I ate in lonely splendor. It was at this point with self-pity coming up fast on the rail that you joined me. Yes, you and I had Roast Beef ... Wantin...

humans have always loved and appreciated beauty. but what is it really? I read this article today -- Natural Women: The Top 10 authentic beauties. It says and I quote: As Albert Camus once said, "Beauty is unbearable, drives us to despair, offering us for a minute the glimpse of an eternity that we should like to stretch out over the whole of time." In other words, "Hot chicks totally rule." Another profound quote from Albert Einstein confirms the above statement, "Anatomy is destiny." the article goes on to say... The fairest of them all? Audrey Hepburn, by a landslide. The selections, made by beauty and fashion editors, makeup artists, photographers, and modeling execs and whittled down from a not-quite-comprehensive list of 100 names, were based on such scientific calculations as the "embodiment of natural beauty, healthy living ... beautiful on the inside and out, with great skin and a natural glow to their personality, as well as their complexion...

back in the days when i could still write and liked to believe i was good at it... if you ask me by moi ;D as i traversed the busy streets of makati city i looked around and saw people like me harassed and tired and maybe a bit angry at the slow moving traffic (which is unceasingly pathetic) if you ask me the hill to malaybalay by moi aussie ;D as we climbed the hill that would bring us to malaybalay i caught a glimpse of the sea. it was a shimmering blue in the mid-morning sun, and for a brief moment i closed my eyes and felt the warm water lap at my skin as i float in the gentle rolling waves that lulled me to sleep. i felt such bliss! indeed, it was a wondrous sight! and when we turned at the bend i couldn't help but sigh, as i bade the sea a last goodbye.

imperturbability - inner peace which doesn't leave when circumstances change. it's a peace which is greater than the problems of life, built on assurance that the tempest will finally pass, we will survive the storm, we may grow stronger because of it and in the meantime, we will not endure alone. imperturbability -- it's the result of a peace which passes understanding. for serenity is not freedom from the storm, but peace amid the storm. this is my goal - to be imperturbable.

here's a poem i took from a book -- a love story that never fails to make me cry everytime i read it -- not to say that it's plausible but hey i'm a sucker for happy endings. how can you put into words that don't sound trite how can you put into words at all when it's like some dark, hidden depth to your soul? then there's love -- sometimes that says hate too it says all right, if i'm not good enough for you i'll climb my horse be it ever so flimsy and pretend i was never, never possessed by this whimsy. but now i can say i loved you this day but i can't regret it nor ever forget it... i loved you is all i can say.

This is the day everything you've learned can be put to positive, productive use. This is the day when you can call upon the courage, the strength and the abilities with which you're blessed, and with them achieve great things. This is the day in which you can truly make things happen. Think for a moment about the power of that ability. You're not limited to painful regrets and empty wishes that this day could have been different, as you are with past days. You're not limited to hoping for what will happen, as you are with future days. Today is the day when you can make things happen, and that is rare and precious indeed. Of all the days in your life, this one that you're living right now gives you the power to truly make a difference. You can think, you can focus, you can make decisions, take action, offer your love and understanding, build, create, and move forward. You can do it all this very day. All that you've ever dreamed of, or hoped for, whatever you si...

jun-jun and the boxers chronicles - Yes, you'll never hear the end of it! As told by: lady crying in pain When I was asked by my friend that I will join him to look for a stripper at Women's somewhere In Taft avenue (obviously I wasn’t aware that you can find one at that place) for my friend's bridal shower -- I was kind of hesitant, but I told myself that its going to be a different kind of experience… fun? Memorable or worst it made me realize how painful it was to see guys selling their own flesh for a little amount of money. It came to a point that I began crying out loud feeling so sorry for the guys we happened to talk and ask for their price for the so called "all the way" service. Famous line "MAGKANO KA BA?" I really couldn't take it that I began losing my control and started crying all the way going back and fort at Taft avenue pricing all the guys we've seen. On our way home one thing I realized I love my brother and all th...

Into the Mind of Terror A sequel to (or maybe prequel -- heck who the bleep cares!) Jun Jun and the Boxers What drove this stripper to demand for extra money whose face became synonymous with evil? All the ladies were scared stiff when he came out from the lavatory and grabbed hold of that liquor bottle, with his attempt to bash my skull. With all this panic and dread, the ladies all wanted to know: who was Jun and why would anyone do such a thing? I took it upon myself to research and started digging for an answer – and ended up in his poorly maintained chamber. Jun had grown up in his father’s house in Kalookan City about 45 minutes away from the Philippine Women’s University where Jackie and I found him. Capitalising on local contacts as well as my best investigative instinct, I was able to get to Jun’s stepfather and then (taking the risk) to Jun himself – who from his death row cell, divulged what was going through his vicious mind that fateful night. Late afternoon of May 14, 20...